Mesothelioma

Lung Cancer caused by exposure to asbestos

A few months ago I was looking at a couple of vidoes on Youtube made by a woman in her 30’s, who had been diagnosed with mesothelioma.  This is quite a rare cancer, especially in one so young, and is caused by exposure to asbestos.  Rarer still, because Heather Von St. James had not been exposed to asbestos.  I made a comment on the video, and her husband emailed me the following, and asked me to put it on my blog, to help other people:

Love and Learning from Cancer

I will never forget the day by wife was diagnosed with cancer. It was the worst day of my life. It was three months after the birth of our first and only child, Lily. To say that we were in shock is a complete understatement.

When the doctor gave us the horrible news, he didn’t mince words. He told us that this disease, malignant pleural mesothelioma, was extremely life threatening. He laid out three treatment options before us. We could get it treated here at the local hospital, head to a regional hospital or go to Boston where there was a specialist who is one of the leading expert’s at dealing with my wife’s form of cancer. The doctor and I waited for Heather to speak, to show any sign of interest in one of the options.  I knew after a moment, though, that she was too terrified and shocked to make a decision.  I turned back to the doctor and said, “Get us to Boston!”

That decision was the first step of a long journey that we fought together. The next few months our lives were completely tuned upside down. We had both been working full-time when we got the diagnosis. Now, my wife was too sick to work. I only had time to work part-time. I had to take care of our infant daughter and support my wife as she made trips to Boston to meet with the cancer specialist.

During these two months, I was a complete wreck on the inside.  I had a constant fear inside me that I would lose my wife and be left to raise our daughter on my own.  More than once, I broke down crying under the stress and pressure of it all. However, I was careful never to let my wife see my fear. I had to be the rock that she could lean on. I had to be strong for her to help her in this fight for her life.

Luckily, my wife and I were incredibly blessed with the most amazing support from our friends, family and neighbors. They were always asking what they could do for us. They gave us everything, including time, money, emotional support, meals and babysitting services. I don’t know what we would have done without them. I can never give them enough thanks. If anyone else is dealing with a situation like this, do not hesitate to accept help when it is offered.  This was difficult for me at first, but I realized very quickly that there is no room for pride when your loved one’s life is on the line. When I accepted this, a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders.

Fast forward a few years, and my wife is now cancer-free after months of intense and difficult mesothelioma treatment under the care of Dr. Sugarbaker. I learned a lot from my time as my wife’s caregiver. I can now handle any challenge, balancing my time and energy in ways I never would have thought possible before. I used my newfound skills to go back to school and get my degree. I graduated with honors, and now I know that any challenge can be met with the right attitude.  I was honored with the opportunity to speak at my graduation, and told my fellow graduates that with perseverance and hope, anything is possible.  Heather and Lily were in the audience to cheer me on, and that was the greatest reward of all. 

If you get chance, take a look at the videos Heather has posted on YouTube.  Here’s one:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rC9Id7PI10Y

Linda